Untangling from Big Emotions: How to Regain Control and Find Balance in the Moment

Your co-worker just showed up to work fifteen minutes late with an iced coffee in hand. What’s your next move? If this ruins your day until lunch, it might be worth taking a look at why this is so bothersome to you. When getting snagged on emotions, try one of these:

Consider Your Values
Check in with your values. If you value respect and responsibility, the actions of your co-worker don’t seem to align with either. Does this situation or person conflict with values that are important to you?

Could It Be an Unmet Need?
Sometimes, when a need goes unmet for too long, discomfort can follow. Maybe you've been burning the candle at both ends, and an extra fifteen minutes of sleep could have been helpful. Does this emotion point to a need that could be addressed by you or someone else?

Be Open to Mirrors
Often, emotions arise when parts of our personalities are triggered. Seeing that iced coffee in your co-worker’s hand might remind you that you’ve always held yourself to a high standard, and asking for forgiveness instead of permission isn’t something that comes easily to you. Does this person or situation reflect a part of yourself that has been ignored or a part that could be tamed?

Trying one of these suggestions may improve your ability to regulate emotions that tend to take over and distract from the present moment.